Black eyes.
I had (and still have,) a love-hate relationship with the colour black. It started out with specs, but kind of got into everything else.
Now, I know why.
Black doesn’t just represent strength or power; it also stands for confidence.
and I hate it, because in terms of real life I never had full confidence in anything since life in HC.
Maybe it’s just me. At least I hope so. If it really isn’t, I will relinquish all ability to trust in others.
(Source: lovestruecolours)
I broke my new year resolution
Okay, Dear blog readers who *somehow* follow me even after my supposed last post.
(Or, you already knew that it wasn’t about to be my last, just yet anyways)
I was thinking of not posting, but these few days’ sequence of events kinda left me mulling over, and I guess a good sharing is on fit to post here.
On saturday, I went for the Song-Lovers’ Society Youth Wing (i.e. ONE) concert with my HC Choir ppl. It was a great concert on dreams and what they mean to us, and to pursue these dreams…
Well, that’s if you do have a dream.
Theron asked me over dinner what my dream was. Frankly, I had no idea. I thought it’d be okay to be dreamless for a while, because some people are just like water: they’d fit any mold they’re given so they’re nice & adaptable =)
… as if it were easy to live out.
But as I thought, it hit me hard that there’s really one thing that I aspire to do, something I realized I scored poorly on for my school’s character strengths test.
This year I aspire to love and be loved. It’s the only one thing both believers and unbelievers will understand anyways.
As for my new year expectations (i have grievous dislike for the word ‘resolution’), I expect myself to grow in discipline, focus and stamina, and to draw nigh unto God. Simple isn’t it?
As of now, everything’s a little messy but still largely under control.
Oh, today i got 2 fortune cookies:
‘You will have the opportunity to meet someone that you’ve longed to meet’.
Wonder who?
‘Love is for the lucky and the brave’
WAT?
Til next time! =|
~Giddy
Last Entry, until further notice
(Sounds silly, but here goes) Dear Blog, This is my last entry until say, A’s. I’ve thought long (as in disjointed long-s) and pretty thoroughly, and I come to conclude that you fall under the ‘not important, not urgent’ part of my life. Although I use you for meditation reflections and emotional rants, I realize that nothing much actually goes on to be typed. (I forget lotsa it!) As of now, I will re-allocate my time on the com to more fruitful work, like Bible Study or Homework. I’ll do so biting my lips all the way, but I have to for the sake of my sanity. To my dear blog followers, who/where ever you may be, I thank you for all your silent support all these months, but if you’d like me to share my life with you please feel free to contact me via other means. I seem very prone to panic attacks all of a sudden, and of all places in church too, especially when I think of work not done. God bless! =)
Kopi with a Mission!
Okay, maybe not as ‘grand’ as it was, but over 10am coffee I had a lot of things to ponder in a semi-drowzy state (YES, coffee makes me feel sleepy!)
What are some expectations for 2011?
I hate the word resolution cos there’s this association with the word ‘break’ i can’t shake off.
Or maybe God wants to rid us of our ungodly, rebellious humanist tendencies (the one that screams “we must save ourselves!”), and to let Him be God.
I seem to have a lot coming up next year, and I’m grateful for many things now that I take a second opinion of 2010.
2010 was rocky, but with that mountain climb comes the stamina to keep walking on in faith, even if I can’t see what’s right ahead.
But like what Wilbur said, I can’t be freaking out halfway and completely burnt just because I’m worried sick over A’s. It’s happened to others before, and it could happen to me too next year.
But this is where the point of difference is, and I’m gonna need to say all the NO’s I can. Something i REALLY hate, but I won’t give myself an option
(Source: bywt)
“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?”
Jeremiah 17: 9
That’s the conclusion I have come to terms with after I examine mine. No, it’s not a masochist act, but a self-reflection.
When I think about it, it’s true; I mean, how many times have I done something but with a hidden agenda so sly I can be in denial?
It can be as much a cause for despair, or it could be an honest look that had almost forgotten the solution:
Here’s the full verse of Jeremiah 17 : 7 - 10
“Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, The heart is deceitful above all things,
whose trust is the LORD.
He is like a tree planted by water,
that sends out its roots by the stream,
and does not fear when heat comes,
for its leaves remain green,
and is not anxious in the year of drought,
for it does not cease to bear fruit.”
and desperately sick;
who can understand it?
“I the LORD search the heart
and test the mind,
to give every man according to his ways,
according to the fruit of his deeds.”
So, the question is: how do we rid our hearts of all selfish & sinful intent?
That will take a while to answer. Much praying still. =)
When one studies, he must be devoted to his line of work. If not, what is he use?
After talking to a deeply respected WL, I came to this conclusion: some opportunities come at too high a cost.
Being a lawyer may be attractive in terms of excitement and pay, but if I go there, will it be too comfortable for me to enter God’s service? I dare not find out.
I guess for now, I am certain of this: I only want a fixed monday-friday work week, with saturday for other things and sunday to rest.
But the study of the bible must go on! =)
(Source: acrotism)
“Knowledge is a strong word. it is merely a certainty, not a probability”
A quote my friend at JCLP found in a law book…
Scary!
(Source: chickenschizophrenia)
Court
Subpoena I pondered the word ‘testimony’ and wondered what it meant. Why some met ill-end destinies, or why lives were well-spent. Between the goats and sheep, and too, great skies and depths. What, indeed made man lose sleep perhaps, why he hadn’t slept The chasm of this mystery no ideas have been passed. How long more in history will this question last? The cloud above the matter was simpler than it seemed. My answer to this dilemma is to ask, what is my deed? For all my actions are just like an open book; If congruent or bizarre whether by hook or crook I pondered the word ‘testimony’ and wondered what it meant I left knowing, because I see it’s about being who God sent. ~Giddy
(Source: taylormokes)
